From Chemistry to a Great Relationship

FROM CHEMISTRY TO A GREAT RELATIONSHIP...GET THERE!

Have you ever met someone with more sparks than a carpet full of static electricity? You know the person—their mere touch makes your heartbeat increase while turning you into a mound of quivering flesh. If you can’t relate, then you haven’t experienced real chemistry. It’s a special feeling that you may experience once in a lifetime or maybe not at all.

My son asked me how I knew that my wife was the right person for me. I told him that I just knew; and after fourteen years, I still know. I know this by trusting my instincts which can’t be learned from some outdated relationship book.

Regardless of how many experts try to explain chemistry between two people, I don’t think there is a rational explanation. More often than not, this chemistry or the lack thereof is usually apparent within two dates. How many times have you been on a date and realized he or she was a dud within minutes of your first conversation?

I once went on a blind date with a girl who showed up for our first date barefoot. I immediately lost interest within minutes of our first and last date because I wasn’t interested in dating barefoot women.

Unfortunately, chemistry can also be confused with sexual attraction. Sex and love don’t belong in the same category because people can have a sexual fling without feelings for the other person. A permanent relationship can’t be solely built upon a sexual relationship.

Serious relationships are similar to the building of a home. You start with a foundation and then build everything else around it.

After a commitment is established, mundane activities like paying bills and raising children together are soon to follow. The ability to handle these activities will lay the groundwork for a potentially successful relationship.

Once the initial groundwork is laid, the relationship has to be nurtured. In order for a relationship to endure over time, both parties must have the ability to demonstrate the following attributes: patience, understanding, compromise and the ability to listen.

Before committing to a permanent relationship, you need to know if your partner is either a dictator or someone who can compromise.

Couples always seem to be in a hurry to get married. Many people jump in too fast only to end up in divorce court. There is a reason why nearly half of all marriages end up in divorce court. Why the hurry? There is no crime in waiting and getting to know your partner before committing to something more permanent.

A good relationship is like a fine wine…both are worth the wait.

... William Greene